**BLGDNKY**

NOW!

As Christmas Quickly approaches,
the Number of Worst present lists will surely be inescapable on the Internet,

and will only be topped in it's shittyness by the none stop lists of

the 5 Best Gifts for a monkey that shits Rainbows,

Or

The Best 7 gifts you can afford but want and Odds are you'll spend the money on the useless shit anyway.

Instead of the same old shit, i figured i would combine these two ultimately shitty things in to one Awesomely Crushing story of a Childhood long forgotten,

Yet... Remembered?

SO how old was I,
5ish,

This is your first and only chance to estimate my age... Or is it?

Soo 5ish

What had just hit the shelves?

THE NINTENDO ENTERTAINMENT SYSTEM

NES - MUtha fuckassss

This was the most epic thing, game, Love I had ever seen in my life, of 5 years.

Again I was 5.

Did i get it from my parent's?

NOPE - they knew better.

But my Grandparent's didn't and Booya X-Mas Morning there it was.

NES for me to love all day and night.

complete with the Duck Hunt, Super Mario Bros. Combo Game.

So much sexiness wrapped in such a average sized box.

So at this point I had in my life experienced what will never be topped as the best X-mas of my life, That is until...

I plugged it in.

I was fucking 5, You can't play Mario when your five,
You have trouble dressing yourself at 5 and I had a Fucking game system meant for teens and preteens.

I kept loosing and loosing and Fucking Loosing, I couldn't Get past the first fucking level.

So I quit. I cried, my mom suggested playing Duck hunt.

That was the worst fucking idea ever, that stupid dog that Laughs at you,

"He's laughing at me MOM! WHY?!?!?!? WHY!?!?!"

Eventually the system was put away and eventually returned a couple months/years later i can't remember, either way

this was the best and most emotionally scaring X-Mas of my life,

The END

See you Next
BlogDonkey

Labels: Childhood Fears, Kids